The puppy blues
Is it normal to regret getting a puppy?
By Dr. Steve Pelton, DVM. Small-animal vet since 2000.
The short answer
- Yes, it's common. In a 2024 study, almost half of dog owners said the puppy months brought real frustration, anxiety or exhaustion.
- For most people it passed, often within a few months, and it usually gets easier as the puppy grows.
- Rest when he naps, ask for help early, and lower the bar for a while.
- If a low mood sticks around, or you ever feel unsafe, talk to your own doctor.
The part people don't say out loud
You wanted this puppy. You picked the name, bought the bed, maybe waited months. And now some days you look at him and think, what have I done?
If that's you, you're in very good company. You're tired. You miss sleeping through the night and leaving the house without a plan. You might not feel the rush of love you expected yet. None of that makes you a bad dog owner. It makes you a person with a baby animal who doesn't sleep.
A big 2024 study from the University of Helsinki asked Finnish dog owners about it. 45.1% said they'd had significant negative feelings during their dog's puppyhood. For most, it didn't last.
A quiet check-in
How are you doing, really?
General education, not veterinary advice. Your vet's plan for your puppy comes first.
Small things that help
- His nap is your nap. Young puppies need a lot of sleep, and a crate or pen nap gives you both a break.
- Trade the night shift with anyone you live with.
- Get a reward-based trainer or puppy class on the calendar. Someone who's seen a thousand puppy tornadoes takes a lot of weight off.
- Tell your vet how it's going. We'd rather hear "I'm struggling" at 10 weeks than at 6 months.
- Count the good days, even the small ones.
If you're thinking about rehoming
Sometimes a puppy truly isn't the right fit, and that's a hard, honest decision some families make. Before you decide while exhausted, talk to your vet and a trainer, and call the breeder or rescue you got him from. Many want to know, and many will help or take him back.
Questions I get every day
Is it normal to regret getting a puppy?
It's very common. In a 2024 University of Helsinki study of Finnish dog owners, 45.1% said they'd had significant negative feelings during puppyhood: frustration, anxiety and weariness. For most people, it passed. If a low mood sticks around, or you ever feel unsafe, talk to your own doctor.
How long do the puppy blues last?
For about half the people in that study who had them, less than 6 months. A separate group of owners whose dogs were 1 to 2 years old scored much lower than they remembered feeling during the puppy months. It usually gets easier as the puppy grows and the nights get longer.
I don't feel bonded to my puppy yet. Is something wrong?
No. Not bonding right away is common, and it usually grows out of lots of small good moments: the first full night's sleep, the first time he comes when called. Give it time, and ask for help if it feels heavy.
What helps with the puppy blues?
Sleep and a little time back for yourself. Use his naps as your rest, split the night trips if you can, lower the bar for a few weeks, and book something that's just yours. A reward-based trainer or your vet can take some of the weight early.
Where this comes from
- Ståhl A, Salonen M, Hakanen E, Mikkola S, Sulkama S, Lahti J, Lohi H. Puppy blues study. npj Mental Health Research. 2024;3:27. University of Helsinki. (45.1% reported significant negative feelings during puppyhood; Finnish owners; duration among those affected; lower scores in owners of 1- to 2-year-old dogs.)
- 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (US): call or text 988.
- American Veterinary Society of Animal Behavior (AVSAB). Humane Dog Training Position Statement. 2021 (reward-based methods).
General education, not veterinary advice. Your vet's plan for your puppy comes first.